April Useless Observations
Hello,
I’d like to let everyone know that today will be my last newsletter. I appreciate everyone that’s read these or interacted with me about the newsletters up to this point. It’s been a wild ride these past few years, and I couldn’t have done it without you all. I’d like to say from the bottom of my heart APRIL FOOLS!
I couldn’t resist working in an April Fools Day joke since today is the first week of April. This year is moving faster than Lewis Hamilton. As a tradition, whenever a new month begins, it’s time for more Useless Observations. Last month’s edition can be found here. Let’s get into it before Jesus comes back from the dead.
UO #1: My favorite albums of 2023 so far are Eric Bellinger & Hitmaka’s 1(800)HIT-EAZY: Line 2 and Don Toliver’s Love Sick. I’ve spoken a bit about Eric Bellinger and Hitmaka previously and they recaptured the magic of their first album, but Don Toliver’s album surprised me. I highly recommend both if you’re a fan of R&B.
UO #2: My least favorite album of 2023 is Larry June & The Alchemist’s The Great Escape. Larry June is a mediocre rapper and I hate mediocre rap. I feel that musicians should try to be great at what they do but if you’re unsuccessful at being great, be bad on purpose. At least being bad on purpose is entertaining. His latest album is the audio equivalent of warm bottled water. Sure, it’ll get the job done if you’re desperate, but it shouldn’t be anyone’s first choice if other options are available.
UO #3: Continental breakfast is a huge scam. You will never eat enough to justify the cost of a breakfast buffet, and if you receive continental breakfast at a hotel it’s laughable that someone would think of it as a perk. Continental breakfast is usually toast, a few pieces of fruit, some juice, and various kinds of cereal. AKA the most inexpensive things you could ever eat for breakfast. Don’t fall for this scam.
UO #4: It bothers me that the new drinking trend among college students is named BORG and not BOG. BORG stands for blackout rage gallon. Was blackout gallon not a descriptive enough name? What happens if you don’t rage?
UO #5: After watching the movie You People, I wonder how many people champion the life and legacy of Nipsey Hussle following his untimely death and have never heard of Julius “Nipsey” Russell, the actor, comedian, and dancer that he’s named after.
UO #6: Whenever I get lost in a rabbit hole of Wikipedia pages or Youtube videos, I’ve always referred to it as being in an internet k-hole. An unintended side effect of writing newsletters is that this happens often whenever I’m researching a long-form article. I’ve never thought much about what a real k-hole was, until today, when I learned that a k-hole is the feeling of dissociation and detachment from reality that comes from doing the drug ketamine. And now I need to find a new term for endless internet searches.