September Useless Observations
Hey everyone,
Another day, another newsletter! Fall is rapidly approaching, which means that the weather is cooling off and football season is finally back. Notre Dame football has already pissed me off enough to last an entire season, so now I can focus on creating more Useless Observations newsletters. Last month’s edition can be found here. Let’s get started before tonight’s presidential debate.
UO #1: Do kids still play Jacks? With the bouncing ball and the little trinkets you have to pick up?
UO #2: People only use the phrase “categorically” when they’re lying about something in a legal or PR setting. No one has ever categorically approved my PTO.
UO #3: Speaking of lying, former President Donald Trump represents all seven of the seven deadly sins all wrapped up into one person. Pride, greed, wrath, envy, lust, gluttony and sloth. Makes me want to rewatch one of my favorite movies, “Seven.”
UO #4: Speaking of favorite movies, my favorite movie of all time now has a follow-up show. I can’t wait to start watching City of God: The Fight Rages On.
UO #5: Who was the first person to invent ice in beverages? Obviously I know that ice exists and even freezers make sense to me, but who was the first person to decide to carve up ice into tiny chunks to put it inside a glass?
UO #6: Instagram has convinced its advertising algorithm that I need a new high-tech wallet. I don’t.
UO #7: Regardless of how you feel about video games today, everyone born in the 1980s is an expert at Mario Kart 64.